Too Legit to Quit

Question: Is rain at 6am in July a legit excuse not to go swimming?

This morning I decided that, yes. Yes it is.

I figured it's a step in the right direction - the direction of positive change - because I actually got out of bed, got dressed, and got in the car. Three steps more than I have ever taken before.

Milestone - I don't hate looking at the mirror anymore. Or pictures. I'm starting to feel okay about me. I think I look fat in some pictures, but that's cause I am right now. I won't always be. It's just where I'm at right now. And it doesn't make me hideous.

Haha...

As I'm typing this, I'm realizing that what I'm doing is meeting myself where I'm at. It's a core value at my job to meet our students "where they're at". Like we talk about it a few times a week.

Lesson learned: It's okay to be okay with me no matter where I am on this journey. Jesus loves me and so do I.

Spinning Sucks

I went to my first spinning class yesterday and I decided that I hate spinning class. The seat was hard and uncomfortable and so painfully far up my ass that I couldn't push myself cause it just hurt more the harder I pedaled. Then when I stood up on the bike, my feet cramped so much that I was just managing pain by alternating sitting and standing instead of concentrating on working out. Plus, all the people in the class were ridiculously hardcore - like biking cleats and spandex is cool, hardcore.

The good news is that I was determined to go yesterday. Firstly, I was feeling depressed after going to court with my favorite student and he was convicted of two felonies (complete bullshit, but that's another story). But I decided to go anyway. Then when I got in my car, the gas tank was empty, but I decided to wait to get gas so I could make sure to reserve a bike for the class. Then I got to the gym and realized I forgot my shoes. I was about to give up, but I decided to reserve a bike real fast, then run home to grab my shoes. I pushed my car on empty and sped home, then while speeding back to the gym, a cop started following me. I thought, "If this guy pulls me over, forget it. I'm just not meant to go." Luckily, he let me go with a dirty look as he drove by. I feel like it was a victory in that several things that may have stopped me when I was the old me - didn't!

Now I've just got to do that everyday. Only not on those stupid bikes.